42 Reasons To Never Visit France

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The landscapes are ugly and the food sucks.

1. So you want to go to France and you think it’s beautiful?

So you want to go to France and you think it's beautiful?

Sergey Borisov / Getty Images

2. Well, I’m sorry to break it to you but France SUCKS.

Well, I'm sorry to break it to you but France SUCKS.

Romrodinka / Getty Images

Sénanque Abbey (Vaucluse).

3. For real.

For real.

Peresanz / Getty Images

French Pyrenees

4. Everything there is ugly and unremarkable.

Everything there is ugly and unremarkable.

Alexandra Reinwald / Getty Images

Gordes (Vaucluse)

5. Don’t expect anything to take your breath away because it won’t.

Don't expect anything to take your breath away because it won't.

Jean-louis Viretti / Getty Images

En-Vau calanque, Cassis (Bouches-du-Rhône)

6. The landscapes are boring.

The landscapes are boring.

Rrrainbow / Getty Images

Rocamadour (Lot)

7. Even the waterfalls are lame.

Even the waterfalls are lame.

Magicdreamer / Getty Images

Jura

8. And don’t even get me started on the beaches.

And don't even get me started on the beaches.

Guithan / Getty Images

Hossegor

9. They’re constantly crowded.

They're constantly crowded.

Vidalidali / Getty Images

Cap Fréhel (Brittany)

10. And all look the same.

And all look the same.

Fred-d / Getty Images

Biarritz

11. The food is so gross.

The food is so gross.

Radu Dumitrescu / Getty Images


12.
Eww

Eww

bruno collinet / Via Flickr: collinox


13.
And the bread below average.

And the bread below average.

Kevin Walsh CC BY-NC-SA / Via Flickr: kev_walsh


14.
So are the mountains.

So are the mountains.

Sergey Kelin / Getty Images

Val Thorens in the Alps.

15. Could you BE more generic?

Could you BE more generic?

Getty Images via Thinkstock

Champagny en Vanoise

16. Normandy stinks.

Normandy stinks.

Stevanzz / Getty Images

Etretat

17. And the Mont Saint Michel is just a stupid looking village surrounded by water.

And the Mont Saint Michel is just a stupid looking village surrounded by water.

Kanuman / Getty Images


18.
Alsace is simply ugly.

Alsace is simply ugly.

G215 / Getty Images

Strasbourg

19. And so is Burgundy!

And so is Burgundy!

Richard Semik / Getty Images

Rock of Solutré

20. You thought Corsica would be better?

You thought Corsica would be better?

Getty Images

Bonifacio

21. Don’t waste your time!

Don't waste your time!

Dušan Zidar / Getty Images

Porto

22. Corsica has literally NOTHING to offer.

Corsica has literally NOTHING to offer.

Gege2812 / Getty Images

Lumio

23. And neither has Camargue, by the way.

And neither has Camargue, by the way.

Richard Semik / Getty Images


24.
It’s just a region devoid of interest and beauty.

It's just a region devoid of interest and beauty.

Bepsimage / Getty Images


25.
The architecture in the country is also banal.

The architecture in the country is also banal.

stephane martin CC BY-SA / Via Flickr: stephanemartin

Versailles

26. The castles look cheap.

The castles look cheap.

Ablestock.com / Getty Images

Château Chenonceau

27. And every building is old and stale.

And every building is old and stale.

Alpha du centaure CC BY / Via Flickr: alphaducentaure

Marseille

28. Lyon is like an ugly wart in the middle of France.

Lyon is like an ugly wart in the middle of France.

Frederic Prochasson / Getty Images


29.
Lille is pretty much the most hideous place on earth.

Lille is pretty much the most hideous place on earth.

Kmeron CC BY-NC-ND / Via Flickr: frf_kmeron


30.
And Bordeaux has no class.

And Bordeaux has no class.

Inigofotografia / Getty Images


31.
The volcanos in Auvergne are just vile.

The volcanos in Auvergne are just vile.

Enrico Carlone / Getty Images


32.
And don’t even get me started on the lake Annecy.

And don't even get me started on the lake Annecy.

Isogood / Getty Images


33.
Lakes in general in France are just gross.

Lakes in general in France are just gross.

Utopia_88 / Getty Images

Jura

34. Rivers are lame too.

Rivers are lame too.

Lianem / Getty Images

Rachtig (Moselle)

35. The country has no history.

The country has no history.

Delpixart / Getty Images

Medieval fortified city of Carcassonne

36. Ew.

Ew.

Clodio / Getty Images

Albi

37. Gross.

Gross.

Goranq / Getty Images

Avignon

38. The whole thing is just an offense to my eyes.

The whole thing is just an offense to my eyes.

Clodio / Getty Images

Castres

39. Seeing this crushes my soul.

Seeing this crushes my soul.

Pase4 / Getty Images

Canal du Midi

40. And if you thought that the French Caribbean would be more worthy of your time, you’re in for a disappointment.

And if you thought that the French Caribbean would be more worthy of your time, you're in for a disappointment.

Isogood / Getty Images

Martinique

41. Because it’s really just as lame as the rest of France.

Because it's really just as lame as the rest of France.

Oliver Hoffmann / Getty Images

Guadeloupe

42. Seriously, don’t bother. Just stay home and don’t ever come to France.

Seriously, don't bother. Just stay home and don't ever come to France.

JH Images.co.uk CC BY-NC-SA jhimages.co.uk I Twitter / Via Flickr: flcherb

Thanks!

Ermmm… C’est peut-être pas si moche que ça la France après tout!

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